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MEMBER BENEFITS

There are so many awesome things about being a part of Pastel Goth! We are not your average Facebook group, we are a curated digital community. Here are some of the things that make us unique and add value to our members' experiences:
1) Our members enjoy a private space. Unlike most large Facebook groups, which are public, Pastel Goth is set to "private", to ensure our members feel safe and comfortable expressing themselves. 

2) You can make new friends! Posts requesting new Facebook friends, pen-pals, or people to play online games with are allowed and encouraged. 

 
3) Learn new skills & get advice! Need makeup tips? Advice for dying your hair? Not sure if your drawing looks right? Our community is full of knowledgeable professionals, talented artists, DIY experts, and self-taught MUAs with fabulous style. 

4) Access exclusive contests, collabs and giveaways! Last year Arda sponsored our contest and the winners received some amazing wigs! Who knows what we'll be up to next?! See all upcoming contests HERE!
 
5) Experience an inclusive community! Most Pastel Goth communities online are limited to "girls". Umm...eww. We welcome all genders, gender expressions and sexual orientations. You do not need to be concerned about fitting in. We love you already! 
6) Enjoy curated content! Our Mod Team reviews every single post before they're released. Comments are scanned every day. We keep our community free of spam, scams, ads, and other internet trash.

7)
 Enjoy aesthetics without bullying! We have heard too many horror stories about the beauty & fashion groups on Facebook, and how the members-and mods-there tear each other apart. It breaks our hearts! In Pastel Goth you can experiment and express yourself--selfies welcome!--without fear of judgement, bullying, or rude comments. 

8) Take a deep breath and know you're protected! You can relax and enjoy sharing your content in our community, knowing that if anyone should say something unkind (rare, but it happens), an entire team of Moderators trained in Compassion First Leadership are there to swoop in, remove the trash, and make sure you feel cozy, supported, validated and loved! 
 
9) Get involved & help shape the future of PG! Do you have an idea for a theme day or contest? Do you want to train as a Mod, or help tell small businesses about our website? We love new ideas & members that are ready to take action to help make them happen! Let us know!

 
There are so many ways to enjoy our community,
and we are adding new opportunities all the time! 
There is no other group like Pastel Goth.
 

MEMBER FEEDBACK

We love getting feedback, and your input is crucial to our community! But please remember that Pastel Goth is run by volunteers with jobs, classes, kids; personal lives. We are not some giant corporation with a customer service department. We will get back to you as soon as possible! We love you. Please be patient. 

URGENT MEMBER ASSISTANCE

Urgent issues include any situation where a member is actively in danger of harm.
Messages to our FB page are for URGENT issues only. Please respect this space.
All non-urgent issues will be redirected to the feedback form below. 

COMMUNITY QUESTIONS & FEEDBACK

Ideas? Questions? Suggestions? Need help? Want to get involved? We'd love to hear from you! If you have an urgent situation, please message us on our Facebook Page (above).

WEBSITE, SM & PROFESSIONAL INQUIRIES

Have a question about our Lifestyle Guide? Want to feature our Shopping Guide on your blog? Found a broken link on our website? Want to collab with us on Insta? Please use our EMAIL for all website, social media & professional inquiries. We can't wait to connect with you! 

Our Admin and Mods do not respond to attempts at bullying, accusations, demands, attacks, or aggression. Any inappropriate communications or verbal violence will result in immediate removal from our community and/or website.

No member of the Pastel Goth team is under any obligation to respond to communications of any form sent to their *personal* accounts. Everyone has the right to personal space. Please use the many Official communication platforms for all Pastel Goth related inquiries. 

 
 

WHO WE ARE & OUR VALUES

Pastel Goth is a highly curated digital community. We began on Facebook in 2017, and have grown to include tens of thousands of members. Our motto is "Be kind or die", and we are part of the creepy-cute subculture also named Pastel Goth. You can read more here. 
Our Values
KINDNESS
RESPECT
COMPASSION
FRIENDSHIP
NON-JUDGEMENT
SMALL BIZ SUPPORT
ARTIST SUPPORT
ETHICAL SHOPPING
INCLUSIVITY
EMPOWERMENT
AUTHENTICITY
COMMUNITY
Our Leader
The Pastel Goth community was founded by Sky Kyo, who currently serves as Administrator, Mod Team Leader, Webmaster, and Brand Manager. Sky writes and designs all PG material. You can learn more about Sky here. 

Our Mod Team
The beating heart of Pastel Goth is our amazing Mod Team. Our Mods are members of Pastel Goth, trained as a team in Compassion First Leadership, who volunteer their time-about 20 hours a week, sometimes more-to take care of our community. 

Our Mods are most often invisible to our members, working night and day behind the scenes to ensure our members feel safe and loved, and prevent trouble before it happens. They deserve the endless respect and gratitude of our entire community.
Mod Team profiles are available in the Announcements section! 

Do you want to train to be a mod? Check out our Mod Resources to see if you have what it takes! Then add your name to the sign up list in the Announcements section. 
Pastel Goth is a highly curated digital community
led by a dedicated group of volunteers who work day and night
to keep our space safe, healthy and beautiful. 
 

GET POST APPROVAL FAST!

The Mod team works hard to take care of the PG Community and make sure all  group posts follow our Guidelines. They do not want to decline your posts! 
GET YOUR POSTS APPROVED FASTER BY AVOIDING THESE 6 COMMON POSTING MISTAKES!
1) VAGUE CONTENT 
We have many content rules, and all of our posts are curated by our Mod Team. If your post is missing information, the mods may ask you for a repost. The quickest way to get your post approved is to be very specific about what you are posting and why. 

 
2) "DELETE IF NOT ALLOWED" 
We know you probably mean it in a polite and respectful way, but what this tells us is that you don't know what's allowed because you haven't read our Guidelines. Since reading the rules is required, we don't approve these posts. If you have already read them and still have posting questions, you can use our many MEMBER FEEDBACK OPTIONS.
 
3) UNNECESSARY TRIGGER WARNINGS 
TW and CW (Trigger Warning and Content Warning) content is not allowed. Putting one on your post will get an automatic decline, even if your content doesn't require one. Read up on our SENSITIVE TOPICS and CWs to understand what kinds of content are not allowed. If your post is allowed, don't get it declined by adding a TW or CW.

4) FOCUSING YOUR POST ON SOMEONE ELSE 
Our community is available for emotional support, however, your post needs to focus on you, your needs and your feelings, not the other person. This way, members can help you problem solve, and feel supported, instead of just trash-talking the person who was unkind to you (which is not allowed)Examples:

 
NO: "My bf hates my hair color how do I change it?"
YES: "I've decided to change my haircolor, can you help me..."
NO: "My parents hate the way I dress but anyway here's my outfit."
YES: "Can I get some hype? I don't get a lot of support for my style irl."
NO: "My BFF said they don't like me anymore since I changed my style to goth. Now no one love me. I must be trash."
YES: "I am feeling really down since I had a falling out with my bff. Plz send memes and love."
5) TALKING TO THE MODS 
Posts go out to the community. Any posts that are addressing the mods or admin instead of the members will not be approved (that would be silly). These posts will be redirected to our MEMBER FEEDBACK OPTIONS.
 
6) UNLABELLED ART
Get your hobby art post approved faster by making it clear that
you are not a professional and your art is not for sale, you are just sharing your creativity with the group. We love your art! Unfortunately, many members in the past have tried to take advantage of our community and just use it as free advertising space. For this reason, we have strict rules on product posting. (We also go way out of our way to support our members' small biz if they respect our AD RULES!)
We want to fill our feed up with YOUR amazing content!
Avoid these common errors and get your posts up effortlessly! 
 

WHAT IS OK TO POST

All of our rules exist as a framework to help keep our community safe, cozy and beautiful. We want everyone to have fun, to feel empowered to express their authentic self without judgement, and to build friendships and e-ships (online friendships) with other members.
TYPES OF CONTENT

1) SELFIES.
Always allowed. Just don't spam them, or use them to fish for likes or followers. 

2) ART/FASHION PHOTOS. Credit the artist/model/provide links whenever possible. Post your own personal art/creations anytime. If you are a professional, see our Advertising Rules below. 

3) LOOKING FOR FEEDBACK/IDEAS. Not sure which hair color to try next? Need to know if an online shop is safe to purchase from? Ask away. 
 
4) LOOKING FOR FRIENDS. Requests for Facebook friends, penpals, etc. is always allowed. For posting links to other social media platforms, see our Advertising Rules below. 

5) VIDEO GAME REQUESTS. If you're looking for new friends to play with or help with game play, you can post anytime. If you're looking for an audience, see our Advertising Rules below. 

6) EMOTIONAL SUPPORT. We are here to help & encourage each other. If you're feeling down, feel free to post asking for some love & attention! However, posts must follow the Sensitive Topics & CWs rules below.
 
7) VIDEOS. Short videos with no talking, showing makeup, an outfit, etc. are ok! We do not allow live video, long videos, or videos with talking. We cannot properly moderate them.
8) MATURE CONTENT. We do not filter content for minors. We do however have limits on content containing Sensitive Topics & CWs. We must also limit posts according to what Facebook allows us to publish. We are sex positive, but we have strict rules regarding things like nudity. See our Sexy Stuff rules under Hot Topics.
 
9) OT POSTS & MEMES. Off Topic posts are totally allowed by active members. Friends talk about stuff! Memes are allowed when they are relevant to the interests of the group and support our values
HOW TO BE A GOOD MEMBER


1) FOLLOW THE RULES. It is important that all of our members understand and agree to follow the rules. PG is our home. If you don't agree with them, that's ok! Our community is not what everyone is looking for. We hope you find another group that works for you. 

2) READ THE ANNOUNCEMENTS. Member opportunities like contests, giveaways, mod training, PIX, and guide listings are posted there!

3) TREAT OTHERS WITH RESPECT, KINDNESS & COMPASSION. Required.

4) PRACTICE INCLUSIVITY. We have a global community. Respect pronouns, gender IDs, ages, cultures, languages and religions. Read our posts on Globalization and Hard Conversations in our Hot Topics section to help you understand how to best interact with other members.

 

5) USE INCLUSIVE LANGUAGE. See #4. Do not address the community with "Hey ladies" or "Hello boys and girls". Posts must be addressed to *all* members, which includes *all* genders, in a respectful and non-binary way. Appropriate greetings include phrases & terms like, "Hey guys" "Hello beautiful people" "What's up dudes?" "Hey babes!" "Aloha creepy cuties!" "Hola PG fam!" "Hey y'all!" and similarly inclusive terms. Comments addressing an individual must use terms the individual is comfortable with and has consented to. 
 

6) BE POLITE. We know it doesn't sound "edgy" but we consider being polite to be pretty badass in a world full of violence, disrespect and broken boundaries. 

 

7) PRACTICE MINDFULNESS. Think before you type. Are you being rude or aggro? If it is not kind, don't say it! Keep our space safe and beautiful for everyone. Mods will remove comments that kill the group's vibe. 

8) POST WITH PURPOSE. Don’t just drop a photo and go! Start a conversation. Ask a question. Share your story. Be a part of the community.
 

9) HAVE FUN. Have as much fun as you want! Share the group with your friends so everyone can join!
 

10) MANAGE CONFLICTS GRACEFULLY. Arguments happen, and that’s ok! Mods aren’t here to police disagreements, but if the rules are broken, make sure to report the harmful content! Learn how in our Reporting Broken Rules section.

 

11) USE YOUR VOICE. Members have a lot of power in Pastel Goth!
Do you think we need more representation in a certain area? Post more of that content! Do you think a brand should be banned from the group?
Take action! Do you have an idea or suggestion? Use our Member Feedback options. Did you see something in group that doesn't belong there?
Report it. We love proactive members! 

Make friends, have fun & express yourself in a safe,
beautiful and bully-free community!
 

WHAT IS NEVER ALLOWED

We take kindness, respect and compassion seriously. We require our members to always treat each other excellently, and to help us keep Pastel Goth a safe, friendly and welcoming community. Depending on the situation, we may warn, correct, or remove a member from our community who violates any one of these rules. 
1) NO BEING MEAN. No shaming, judging, name-calling, rudeness, disrespect, aggression, or bullying. No verbal violence or abuse is allowed. If we believe you are being intentionally hurtful or disrespectful at any time, you will be immediately removed from membership. 

2) NO ACCUSATIONS. No attacks, gossip, or slander against any member, person or brand. See Banned Brands below. 

3) NO DISCRIMINATION. No racism, sexism, ageism, ableism, classism, bigotry or prejudice of any kind.
 
4) NO GATEKEEPING or ELITISM. No one person defines Pastel Goth. Pastel Goth is *not* just an aesthetic: it is a mindset, a lifestyle, and a constantly evolving subculture with inclusivity at its core. 

5) NO BREAKING FB LAWS. It's the platform we're on. Respect is required.

6) NO PERVING: No sexualizing of other members. No DMing, stalking or creeping on members outside of group. See the Sexy Stuff Rules in Hot Topics below. 
 
7) NO INNAPROPRIATE LAUGH REACTS. Laughing at others/Passive aggressive bullying is not allowed.
 
8) NO REPOSTING. NEVER share anything said or posted in PG elsewhere without permission. Keep PG a safe, private space for everyone. 
 
9) NO OPINION SPAM. If someone does not ask for your opinion or advice, yours is not welcome. It is pushy, presumptuous and rude. You are not allowed to state your personal opinion as if it is a universal fact. See (10).

10) NO BULLDOZING OR GASLIGHTING. No one is allowed to invalidate someone else's personal experience or opinion. Just because you're a "professional" or educated or whatever, doesn't mean you have all the answers or you are always right. See (9).

10) NO EMOTIONAL DUMPING. Everyone has bad days and problems sometimes. Asking for support in the form of encouragement, inspo pics or memes is fine. But while your feelings are valid, dumping the details of a problem or your feelings in PG is not appropriate, and can be harmful for other members. See Sensitive Topics & CWs below.
 
11) NO NEGATIVE FEEDBACK. If you can't figure out a kind way to say it: DON'T. This includes commenting on posts asking for feedback, CC, (Constructive Criticism) and opinions.

12) NO CHANGING TOPIC. Respect the OP and the purpose for their post.
 
13) NO SUPPORT OF BANNED BRANDS. No posts, comments or links in support of any Banned Brands are allowed. See Banned Brands below.
 
14) NO SOCIAL MEDIA LINKS. Unless it's Sunday. See the Advertising Rules.
 
15) NO ADVERTISING. Unless your business has been reviewed and you are listed in the Shopping Guide or Lifestyle Guide. See the Advertising Rules.

16) NO DISRESPECT OF THE ADMIN TEAM. The Admin Team--including Administrators, Moderators, and others--keeps our community going. This team is made up of volunteers who dedicate their free time in order to protect and serve our members. It is a gift. Any member found lacking gratitude for that gift, or otherwise disrespecting the team, will be immediately removed from the group. 

17) NO STEALING CONTENT. Any theft of a member's art, pictures, or other content will result in your immediate removal from the group. If you post stolen material and claim it as your own you will also be removed. See our post about Content Theft in our Hot Topics section.
We are here to lift each other up! Before commenting or posting,
ask yourself, "Am I adding to the good vibes of the group?" 
 

HOT TOPICS

These topics are both sensitive and complex, and require more than a one-line rule to be understood. We have done our best to address each other these, and will continue to edit our content as our community evolves. 
CONTENT THEFT


If you wish to personally keep or share original art, photos, or posts from members of Pastel Goth, ASKING IS A MUST. If sharing, provide credit! Whether you intend to use a member's content as inspiration for a tattoo, your phone wallpaper, or to post on insta, you have to ASK them first. This is common courtesy, and in many cases legally required, and we want you to know that PG takes it seriously.
 

Once you have permission to use someone's content, be sure to give them credit anywhere it is shared. Be a part of their community, and be honored to have the opportunity to support them in a non-monetary way. We love & respect our artists, models, photographers, writers, hairstylists, MUAs, and creators of every kind. We want them to thrive and be known for their contributions to the world. This goes hand in hand with why we ask everything shared to PG is credited.

We want to make it clear that removing content from PG without permission is highly against our rules and values. Thank you for doing the right thing!
 


SAFE CONNECTIONS
 

Pastel Goth is literally built for you to make new, safe friends in the Pastel Goth community! Even though the Mod & Admin Team screen profiles before accepting members into PG, sometimes unsafe people slip through. We don't have many problems, but we still encourage members to practice safe habits online:
 

1) Carefully review profiles before accepting Friend Requests, including those from PG members.
 

2) Remember that not everyone online is who they appear to be.
 

3) Let the Mod Team know if someone from PG is harassing you outside of the group.
 

4) If you are building your Facebook profile to include "strangers", make sure your exact location, place of work, and home address is NOT available on your profile.
 

5) If you are meeting up with someone in your area, meet in a public place and never agree to spend time alone or get into someone's vehicle.
 

6) If you notice someone getting victimized in PG and you think they are unaware, contact an Admin so we can step in if needed.
 

Thank you for helping us keep our community safe!


 

SEXY STUFF


When it comes to the topic of sex and romance in our community, there is a lot we are positive about! 
 

(+) We are a sex positive group.

(+) We are a kink positive group.
(+) We are a body positive group. 

(+) We believe that nudity is not inherently sexual. 
(+) We also support ENM, poly & RA relationships. 
 

Sex can be a healthy and beautiful part of a human life, it is not "dirty", nudity/revealing clothing is not always about sexuality and it is not "shameful" or "slutty".
 

Sexuality can have a healthy place in a community. But not everyone wants to be sexualized. Beauty and sexuality are separate things. And we respect that.
 

We do our best to create guidelines that allow space for healthy self expression, while being a safe and respectful space that nurtures creativity and friendship.
 

We do allow:

YES | Artistic nudity (Not photography or photorealistic art).

YES | Photography that includes cleavage lines & butt cheeks.

YES | Could you see it on a public billboard? If so, it's probably ok!

YES | Abstract sexual material that is not detailed or explicit. 

YES | Pics that are sexual/kink related that don't contain nudity.

YES | Art (not photography) that is obviously sexual in nature.

We do NOT allow:

NO | Sexualizing other members is not ok.
NO | Sexual/pervy comments are not allowed.

NO | Romantic requests towards other members are not ok.

NO | Posts looking for sexual attention are not allowed.

NO | No nudity or pornographic photography can be posted (FB laws). 

NO | Any content supporting unhealthy sexual attitudes or behaviour is NEVER allowed
(force, abuse, assault, manipulation, pedophilia, etc.).

This is a very grey area to moderate. Many situations are highly contextual, and can be difficult to navigate. We want to allow everyone as much self-expression as possible, while still maintaining our safe space. Please be mindful in your posting, and if there is a conflict, work together with our Mods to make the best choices for our community.

 


HEALTHY CONFLICT


We are not here to police our members' conversations. Conflicts are natural and healthy, and many of our members have amazing conflict management skills!

It is not always easy to engage in healthy conflict. But there are things that can help:
 

YES!- Ask questions instead of attacking. "Did you know...?" etc. 
YES!- Don't assume the harm was intentional. People make mistakes. 
YES!- Try to see the issue from the other person's point of view.
YES!- Try not to read emotional "tones" (like sarcasm) into text.
YES!- Use "I feel..." and "I think..." starters, instead of stating your opinion as fact.
YES!- Try to find common ground; any part of the topic you agree about. 

Scroll down to read more tips, in "Hard Conversations", our next Hot Topic!

If any conflict escalates to the point of any member breaking the rules, then it does require moderation. Report it immediately, and do not engage further in the conversation. 


We ALL have things that make us angry. Some times we're short tempered, and some things make us angry for the right reasons. However, when you use that anger to attack another member by name calling, shaming, or starting an argument, certain things happen:
 

X You become the bully.

X The other person may become defensive and not see your point of view.

X Depending on the situation, you might be removed from the group.
 

You are responsible for how you treat others here. If you want to argue, rant, bully, attack, dump your emotions or disrespect others, there is the whole rest of the internet for that. This is our home and we do not allow that here. You will be removed. 

You may be angry about an important topic, but if you are hurting others or breaking our rules while you do, then you are not only disrespecting the group, you are grossly disrespecting that topic, by using it as a weapon for your own rage. 

If you want to make a difference, and use your voice for positive change, then be proactive and send us a message. Tell us what kind of action you want to take and why. We will do our best to empower your cause. If you spoke in anger and you were removed from the group, but you would like to make amends, send us a message. Everyone makes mistakes...and there's alot going on in the world to be angry about right now.  


 


HARD CONVERSATIONS


We are here to enjoy PG and treat each other EXCELLENTLY. We love seeing deep conversations happen here, and the admin don’t want to limit topics to the “easy” stuff or constantly supervise conversations. We have seen some absolutely *beautiful* examples of conflict management in this group…and we have seen some conversations that could have ended better. It’s not easy. Everyone gets angry, defensive, or takes something the wrong way sometimes.
 

Here are some tips on how to keep your cool and diffuse a potential disaster:
 

YES | A genuine apology goes a long way. (Note: “I’m sorry, but…” has the opposite effect.)

YES | Say it straight out, “I respect your opinion, but I disagree”

YES | Give someone the benefit of the doubt: a lot of problems escalate due to miscommunication.

YES | Own your feelings: Use “I feel” statements to express yourself.

YES | Validate someone else’s thoughts and feelings: “That is a very good point”, “I can see how you would feel that way”.

YES | Take a step back: “I feel angry right now, and I don’t want to talk about it anymore.” Is definitely better than losing your shit. Sometimes it takes a minute to calm down.

YES | Ask questions instead of assuming! “Have you considered?” “Did you know?” “Did you mean to?” etc.

YES | Don’t tell someone to “calm down” (it has the opposite effect!) Try, “I didn’t mean to upset you.” or, “I don’t want to have an angry conversation.” instead.

YES | Try to consider the other person’s point of view.

YES | Be honest about your agenda! “I really want you to agree with me, because I feel like it’s very important.” , etc, can give you a platform to express yourself without making the other person defensive.
 

Things to keep in mind:
 

(+) Your thoughts, opinions and feelings are totally valid: so are everyone else’s.

(+) If one or more people in the conversation aren’t adept at the English language, or are using unfamiliar words or slang, it can complicate things quickly. Ask to clarify if something seems vague/out of place, or you don't understand something.

(+) You don’t know what kind of day someone has had, or what’s going on in their life at the moment. Be gentle.

(+) Do you know who you are talking to? This group is *worldwide*. We are home to diverse cultures, ethnicities, ages, genders, identities, worldviews and religions. People have different ideas of “good” and “bad”, “ok” and “not ok”. That can be a challenge, and is a good thing to keep in mind!

(+) Just because someone disagrees with you, doesn’t mean they don’t value or understand your perspective. It doesn't mean they don't respect you.

(+) Don’t assume someone wants your criticism/opinion. Unless they have stated so directly, be safe and ask.

(+) The easiest way to not make a conflict worse is to not say anything. When in doubt, remain silent, and report the content!
 

This is hard, you guys! Thank you for taking on the challenge of compassionate communication. No one is perfect, and everyone is going to make mistakes, but we are setting these standards so this can stay a safe space for everyone to learn and share, even through the hard stuff.
 

In short:
 

<>Don’t judge. Don’t force.

<>Ask questions.

<>Step back.

<>Own your thoughts & feels.

<>Validate others.

<>Apologize.

<>Speak with Love.

<>Ask for help.

 

 
GLOBALIZATION


SUMMARY / TL,DR: Pastel Goth is wholeheartedly against racism and appropriation. Certain things are not allowed (see below). But we also have a global, multicultural group, and things get complicated. If you have an issue, do not accuse or argue with another member. Report the content, or message us. 
 

Pastel Goth is a safe space for everyone. We do NOT support racism here. We work *very* hard to create a safe, supportive, bully-free space with zero discrimination for everyone.
 

Some points to consider:
 

Cultural appropriation is a complex and controversial topic. It is also *highly* contextual, and because it has to do with respect, the intention of the person or people also comes into play.

The Pastel Goth subculture itself borrows themes, fashion, symbolism and style from many cultures, subcultures, spiritualties and religions, and often does so in an ironic or playful way. Though we may celebrate our style for its diversity, many people see Pastel Goth itself as highly appropriative.
 

Our group includes members from ALL around the world including countless cultures, subcultures, religions, worldviews, spiritualties and languages.
 

All of these things make issues of appropriation very complicated. But here are some ground rules:
 

NEVER EVER ALLOWED EVER:
 

NO | No inflammatory posts meant to incite arguments on racial or cultural topics are allowed.

NO | No one person can speak for their entire race/culture/religion/country and decide what is or isn’t ok.

NO | No member is allowed to *assume* the race/ethnicity/culture/religion/spirituality of another member, based on their appearance or otherwise.
NO | No member is allowed to demand personal information from another member such as their race, culture, ethnicity or religion. 

NO | No member is allowed to accuse another member of cultural appropriation.

NO | No member is allowed to force their beliefs, values, morals, ideas, religion or anything else onto other members.
NO | No obvious symbols of hatred or oppression, such as the American Confederate flag or Nazi swastikas. (This does not include Hindu or Buddhist swastikas, which are an ancient religious symbol with a very different meaning.)

NO | No slanderous terms, racial slurs, or slang names for people groups, including the N word.

NO | No mockery of marginalized peoples through costume such as Blackface or the wearing of Native American/First Nations headdresses.

We DO allow, and highly encourage:
 

YES!- The sharing of any and every culture and religion, including art, stories, recipes, symbolism, spirituality, fashion, traditions and events, etc. (as long as it’s done respectfully and follows our other rules).

YES!- The respectful debate of controversial issues between members.

YES!- The respectful asking of questions in order to learn more about another member’s culture, country, religion, spirituality, or language.

YES!- The sharing of your own cultural experience from your own point of view.


We DO support:
 

YES!- The representation of marginalized peoples in Pastel Goth photography, art, fashion, etc.

YES!- The respectful costume or cosplay of a character outside your own culture(s).

YES!- The apology and personal growth of an individual or company after an act of discrimination, racism or appropriation.
 

WHAT TO DO if you see outright racism or other rules broken: Do not respond, report it!
WHAT TO DO
if you are sharing something you know might be misinterpreted: be proactive and explain your content ahead of time in your post or comment. 

A possible instance of racism or cultural appropriation is NOT an invitation for you to disrespect, shame or attack another member. We are all here to learn from each other. 

HAVE AN IDEA FOR A NEW "HOT TOPIC"? THAT WOULD HELP OUR COMMUNITY? MESSAGE US!

We are here to support each other through difficult things.
Facing hard topics together helps us grow!
 

BANNED BRANDS

We do our best to support brands that share our values. Those brands that stand directly and intentionally against our values have been banned from our website and community. They do not deserve our attention, support or sales. 
1) Banned Brands are listed on our X LIST Page. 
2) Posts, comments or links in support of these brands are not allowed.
3) If you have a brand you would like added to the list, please compile current, reputable evidence and email us your suggestion. 
4) Accusations, gossip, or slander against any person or brand is not allowed.
5) Posting an item from a Banned Brand is permitted only if brand is called out as problematic in the post, or posted with good reason (like a gift).
Hate isn't cute and accusations are not ok!
Instead of making rude comments, make a difference:
Collect evidence and report unethical brands the right way.
 

REPORTING BROKEN RULES

If you see a member breaking the group rules in any way, do not confront them or engage in conflict with them. Do not comment "admin" and "mods" to alert the team.
Instead, REPORT the content immediately. 
1) REPORTING A COMMENT Use Facebook tools to report any comment you think is breaking the rules to the Mod Team. (How to do this may vary depending on your device.)
 
2) REPORTING A POST Our posts are all curated (carefully filtered according to our rules and values) by our Mod Team. However, a member may edit their post after it was approved to include content that breaks the rules. Please report these posts using Facebook tools. 
 
3) COMMENTS ON YOUR POST If members are commenting negative or harmful things-or otherwise breaking the rules-on your own post, do not respond. Use Facebook tools to turn off commenting, and then report those comments using Facebook tools. A Mod will review the situation and help you!

4) 
REPORTING OTHER HARMFUL BEHAVIOR If you have a concern about a member's behavior, a fake profile, unwelcome DMs, or any other concerns, please message the PG Facebook Page immediately! Do not hesitate to voice your concerns. We care about your safety and comfort.  
Don't engage in hurtful conflict! Report issues right away.
The Mod team is here to protect you!
 
 

SENSITIVE TOPICS & CWs

In the past these topics were allowed in group, as long as they were properly labelled with a "CW" (content warning) in order to warn and protect sensitive members. However, the group is now too large to effectively supervise and moderate this type of content. These topics matter to us, but we have not yet found a safe way for our thousands of members to engage this material. For now, we encourage you to find an alternative safe space to have those conversations. 
1) Sensitive Topics include gore, sex, death/loss, kink/BDSM, mental illness, addiction, politics, illness, trauma, Covid, personal crisis, etc.
2) These topics may be mentioned, but may not be posted about or spoken of in comments in detail, as it may trigger other members.
3) No pictures containing possibly triggering material may be posted.
4) Topics that may bother sensitive individuals but are allowed in group include spiders, snakes, tattoos and body mods, fake/artistic blood & gore, taxidermy, coffins and ironic suicidal phrases. Flashing lights may appear in videos. 
5) We are not able to handle emergencies. If you are in distress, in danger, or need help, please call a Crisis Hotline in your country. 
Be considerate of other members when you post and comment. We care about important topics, but we need to consider the safety of all of our members. 
 

ADVERTISING RULES

Pastel Goth is an intentional community. Our advertising rules exist to discourage members from exploiting our space (only joining for free advertising or fishing for followers), to protect our content flow (who wants to scroll through ad after ad? eww.) and to actively support our members' small businesses. The only advertising that is allowed is by shops and brands we *trust*. They have been reviewed for quality, and have agreed to adhere to our group values and ethical shopping standards. 
FOR MEMBERS

1) SOCIAL MEDIA LINKS Personal social media links are allowed only on Sundays. Make friends & connect on different platforms! Are you selling products or services? That's not personal, that's professional. 
 
2) PERSONAL SALES If you have a new or lightly used personal item for resale (it doesn't fit, etc.) you may post your item on Sunday. Here's how:

~ Make your offer clear: Include price, size, brand, country you're shipping from/cost of shipping & accurate pictures.
~ Sell your item ethically: Never charge more than you paid, etc. 
~ Be fair in your selling: The first member interested gets first dibs.
 
3) PERSONAL/HOBBY ART We fully support our members' creativity! Personal art/WIPs (work in progress) can be posted any time. Get advice & support, connect with other artists, etc. Do you sell art or do commissions? That's not personal, it's professional.

4) 
COMMISSIONING AN ARTIST If you would like to commission an artist for a project, please check our Shopping Guide and Lifestyle Guide. Many of our artists are open for commissions. 

5) 
FUNDRAISERS Unfortunately, due to scam risks, we no longer allow the posting of outside fundraisers.
 

FOR LISTED SHOPS & BRANDS
 
 

 
1) HOW TO POST & COMMENT: In order to have your ads approved for group viewing, you need to remember 2 very basic rules. These rules also apply to comments on other posts. They serve as ID markers to our Mods, so they know your content isn't spam. Improperly posted ad material will be removed.

~ 1) Identify yourself: Always identify yourself as a listed shop or brand.
~ 2) Include a link: Always include a link to your page in the shopping guide or lifestyle guide in your post or comment. 

2) POST ANY DAY OF THE WEEK! Listed businesses are allowed to post up to 3 times a day, every day of the week! That's over 1000 ads a year-for FREE in a space filled with tens of thousands of niche market shoppers. 

3) POST A VARIETY OF CONTENT! We encourage listed businesses to post a variety of content--not just overt ads, but WIPs, polls, giveaways, videos, contests, sales and interactive content. Get involved with the community!

I WANT TO GET MY BRAND OR BUSINESS LISTED!
Our advertising rules create opportunities for small businesses,
while protecting our members from scams and spam!
 
 
PASSWORD FOR MEMBERSHIP REQUESTS
CUPCAKE